The best part of the Barbie movie

I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel about the Barbie movie. As a young girl, I didn’t see myself reflected in the Barbie world and my family couldn’t afford the Dream Houses and Cars and Campers I circled in the JCPenney catalogue.

Still, I loved Barbie. I had two Barbies, a Ken, and a bed made out of a showbox and a tissue paper, and that was all I really needed for the first romance stories I made up, where a naked, amnesiac Ken showed up in a middle of a storm, “good” Barbie placed him in her bed to recover, and her bad evil twin Barbie (you could tell she was evil because of her cut hair and marker makeup) seduced him. I didn’t know what seduction involved. I just knew it was the basis of many of the TV shows we watched.

Seeing the spirit of how young girls interacted with Barbie on the big screen was a delight. But even more thrilling, from a personal standpoint, was watching Latina move star America Ferrera talk about the impossible standards set for today’s women.

America Ferrera is the physical model for Gillian Armstead-Bancroft, my once-perfect but now struggling wife, mom, financial planner, and bruja from Full Moon Over Freedom, and that she was the one outlining how woman are made to feel that they are never enough was an absolute triumph.

You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can’t ask for money because that’s crass. You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean. You have to lead, but you can’t squash other people’s ideas. You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining. You’re supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged….I’m just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. (You can read the full monologue here.)

My entire writing career has been about creating heroines who show up on the page not caring about being “liked,” who worry more about achieving something meaningful to themselves than appeasing the whims of others. They have a journey, they have things they need to figure out, but fundamentally believing in their worthiness is not one of them.

These heroines have repeatedly been called “unlikeable.” Predominantly by women.

So while I enjoyed the movie and leaned into the fantasy of Barbie defeating the patriarchy, more enjoyable for me was watching a Latina heroine outlining the way it is and calling it bullshit.

My first Mexican-American romance hero

Justin-Johnson Cortez, my movie-star casting for my hero Nicky Mendoza in Full Moon Over Freedom

When I sat down to write my second book in the Milagro Street series, a series about multi-generational Mexican-Americans in small-town Kansas, I did it with the intention of making my hero Mexican-American.
 
This was no small thing. As of yet, I hadn’t written a Mexican-American hero. Outside of the books of my hard-working Latinx romance author friends, Latino heroes are missing. In the media we engage with, only seven percent of the workers (actors, writers, editors, producers) are Latinx although we make up 19 percent of the American population. 
 
We need brown heroes shown in our media. I’m thrilled that in Full Moon Over Freedom, I finally get to correct my omission.

Nicky Mendoza, my first Mexican-American hero

Nicky Mendoza, my hero in Full Moon Over Freedom, is the bad-boy-turned-successful-artist who’s returned home to Freedom, Kansas for the summer with a secret: He’d been in love with our heroine, divorced mom Gillian Armstead-Bancroft, since the moment he saw her across the lunchroom in the fifth grade. He never told the girl who was his best friend how he felt, not even when she asked him to free her of the burden of her virginity. Now adults, they meet up again in Freedom, both only intending to be there for a summer, and he is determined to help her without ever revealing how he feels about her. 

Nicky is a good, good man. I am lucky to know so many good, good brown men to base him off of.

My inspiration

I was the first grandchild of a huge multi-generational Mexican-American family all living in a small town in southeast Kansas, so I was instantly adored, not only by my tías, but by my tíos. They all called me Angie. I moved away young, so when I came back to visit, my Granpo Frank would take me out for waffles, my tíos Daniel and Jesse and Pepe would ask me how I was doing and genuinely listen, and my closest tío, Adam, would always make me feel so seen and interesting. My dad’s cousins, Danny, Robert, and Bobby were fun, sweet guys closer to my age who I always had a crush on. Younger than me, my cousins Casey, Ryan and Ross, and Michael have all turned into amazing men with amazing families. 

My dad passed away in 2015 and one thing my brother Roman said at the funeral was my dad’s smile was one you could see across the room. That was true. I loved my dad. Everyone loved my dad.

My cousin Favian Hernandez is an incredible artist living in Laramie, Wyoming. His astonishing paper mache animal sculptures, inspired by the piñatas he would make with his mom, are displayed in art galleries. I interviewed Favian about being a Mexican-American artist and, more than anyone else, he inspired the creative ethic of my artist, Nicky Mendoza.

Inspiration from Hollywood

Once I decided on the heart of my Mexican-American hero, I needed a real-world, heartbreaker face to attach to him. My family comes from the indigenous people of Guanajuato, Mexico, and that darker skin, dark hair, and shorter height can still be seen in us. I wanted that for my hero. But searching for a young brown Latino leading man made me realize the lack of them. 

Fortunately, I discovered Justin Johnson-Cortez.

Justin is an actor, director, and writer who starred in the groundbreaking western TV show, “Walker: Independence.” When I included him in a social media post, it turned into one of the loveliest moments of my publishing career.

Soon after posting, I got a message from his wife. He’d sent her my post because she’d been, in that moment, reading After Hours on Milagro Street!!!! It was as surprising and satisfying as being recognized in the airport.

Since that moment, Justin, his wife, and I have all become friendly on social media and I’m so grateful to them both for their enthusiasm about using Justin as a positive representation of proud, brown heroes. 

Paying attention to inspiration

(Author’s note: I originally provided this article to my Hyperromantic Patreon subscribers at the $5/month tier. To read the full article, subscribe to my Hyperromantic Writers.)

The most common question I get as a multi-published romance author is “Where do you get your ideas from?”

It can seem so mystifying how a writer pulls thoughts and words from the air and turns them into a 100,000-word book, a book that can feel so real in reader’s minds. An author thought up REDRUM. An author thought up Hobbits. An author thought up a priest during truly filthy things with sacramental oil (and you know who you are, you naughty woman!). Every thought and every word and every book sprouts from a single moment of inspiration.

During a four-hour drive to Dallas last weekend, I listened to the phenomenal book The Villa by Rachel Hawkins. It’s not a spoiler to mention an early moment of inspiration for an author in the book. Houses remember, she writes in her journal. She instantly recognizes, as do we all, that it’s a fabulous line. Houses remember. It feels good on the tongue. The writer in the book isn’t sure how she’s going to use the line, isn’t even entirely sure what it’s referring to. She just knows it’s fabulous.

Listen to the hindbrain, not the muse

As an author who’s enjoyed my own moments of inspiration, I love this description of the hindbrain at work. Muses are flighty, too personified as something that can come and go, that can escape from you or that you must appease. The hindbrain is always there. In reality, the hindbrain regulates our automatic functions, like breathing and sleeping. The creative hindbrain works the same way, always back there, churning, working, processing your day through the lens of the stories you have to tell, sending up inspiration and character development and dialogue and, when the flow is right, whole pages of words.

You’re not shackled to the hindbrain. Your goal is to give it space to think it thoughts; the built skill is recognizing when it sends up creative gold.

Inspiration that launched my career

A gift from my hindbrain helped launched my publishing career. At the end of 2015, I’d been a longtime freelance writer, digital content consultant, and aspiring romance author. I was looking through books on my phone and thought I saw one titled “The Billionaire’s Prince.” (I tell this story a lot, so feel free to skip this part if you’ve already heard it.) I assumed this title was for a male/male book. In an instant, I realized that I assumed the billionaire in the title was a man. Deeply ashamed of myself for assuming a woman couldn’t be the billionaire, I realized just as quickly that that was the story I had to write: a story of a bad-ass billionaire businesswoman who had all the smarts, power, and resources to possess a prince.

From that hindbrain lightning strike, my debut book Lush Money was born.

Dialogue before characters

In my most recent release, After Hours on Milagro Street, my hindbrain delivered twice.

Before I even started the book, I wrote this down in my writing journal:

“I want you to understand something. My pussy...she’s not very discriminating. She’s attracted to most men. If we do anything, it’ll be hot. And memorable and interesting. But it won’t be special. It won’t be about you.”

Those who’ve read the book already know it’s what my heroine Alex tells our hero Jeremiah in a dark hallway before an angry reunion. The inspiration for this book sprang from multiple sources, but my concept for my furious heroine, the best bitch in bartending, sprang from this quote that came to me out of nowhere while I was sitting at my computer. I craved to write a heroine as self-possessed, as proud, as feral, and as giving as little fucks as the heroine in this quote.

My hindbrain gave me Alex and I thank it immensely.

Inspiration for the next book

In September, the second book in the Milagro Street series, Full Moon Over Freedom, will be released. It’s a second-chance romance book about a Gillian Armstead-Bancroft, a once-perfect wife and mom who’s lost her perfection, and Nicky Mendoza, the former bad-boy-turned-successful-artist who she hopes can help her get her groove back. She thinks of him as a very sexy long-lost friend and he, unfortunately, thinks of her as the girl he’s loved almost his whole life. The pining in this books is heart pumping!

Full Moon is an iteration of the first book I ever finished, in 2009. That first iteration wasn’t published for a reason (it was awful) but, while re-reading it in preparation for this book, I wrote down a passage from that original book:

"Why didn’t you ever ask me out?"

"You would have said ‘no.’ You were walking out of Freedom when we were in grade school. You had no time to waste on a boy who’d probably end up working at the plant….

Also, I was afraid you would just use me for sex."

In the 2009 installment, they’d never had sex and it’s now all they can think about. But in the current iteration, he’d been her “sex teacher” the summer after her freshman year in college. Unaware of his feelings, my very practical heroine viewed him as a practical solution to the problem of her virginity.

That line-- I was afraid you would just use me for sex—was the crux of the modern iteration, I realized. The original Nicky had better self-preservation instincts than the new Nicky, and that desire to protect himself now is one of the wedges keeping these two apart, although he can barely keep his hands off of her.

You never know when inspiration may strike. Listen to that hindbrain. Cultivate trusting it. And write down the treasures it sends you.

Preorder Full Moon Over Freedom now

Inspired by her own upbringing as a Mexican American in Kansas, Lopez offers a steamy love story that is also a repudiation of whitewashing history for the sake of upholding narrow definitions of what it is to be American…. It’s her ability to balance these lascivious passages with pointed, meaningful storytelling that sets her work apart and makes her a writer worth returning to again and again.

— Maureen Lee Lenker on After Hours on Milagro Street, Entertainment Weekly

Announcing next book in Filthy Rich series...

In Lush Money, book 1 of my Filthy Rich series — about powerful, wealthy women who get what they want because they’ve earned it — we met self-made Mexican-American billionaire, Roxanne Medina.

In book 2, Hate Crush, coming June 29, you’ll get to read about millionaire winemaking princesa, Sofia de Esperanza y Santos.

Now, I’m thrilled to introduce you to Mexican heiress-turned-CEO, Cenobia “Cen” Trujillo, in book 3, Serving Sin. Serving Sin will be available early 2021.

Serving Sin is about Roman Sheppard, the half-brother of the royal family of the Monte del Vino Real, who we met in Lush Money and Hate Crush. He’s a decorated ex-Army Ranger raised in a Texas trailer park. Thirteen years ago, he became internationally famous for rescuing a kidnapped Mexican teenage heiress. Now, he's the head of a successful security firm and, although he's been named advisor to his kingly brother, he's known in the media as the "reluctant prince," unwilling to fully accept his place in his family and the small wine-growing kingdom in Northern Spain.

The teen heiress, Cenobia Trujillo, is now a 30-year-old CEO of the largest automobile manufacturer in Mexico who needs Roman's help again. There have been serious threats against her, and with a month until the launch of her car that will change the Mexican auto industry for the better, she doesn’t have the time to be distracted. She asks him to come to Mexico to protect her.

Protection isn’t the only reason Cenobia – who asks people to call her “Cen” – wants Roman around. She’s ready to dispel the teenage fantasy notion that he’s her “one” with some womanly real-life pleasure. And there’s a reason Roman has stayed a continent away. He’d been a 26-year-old soldier who knew better than to be fascinated by the girl on the cusp of 18. He’ll go and protect her. But the last thing he’s ever going to call her is “Cen.”

Serving Sin will be available from Carina Press early 2021.

Inspiration for Roman Sheppard and Cenobia Trujillo. To see more inspiration, check out my Pinterest board

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How to Fill the Well as a Writer

New York Times bestselling author Joan Johnston talks about the need for writers to "give yourself the opportunity to fill the well so you have something to write about," in the latest issue of Romance Writers Report. I found this so inspiring. Writers cave up, have endless deadlines, and tell victory stories about how many days in a row it's been since they've showered. Many of us, no matter our endeavors, stick our noses to the grindstones and then proudly compare how little nose we have left.

Stop it. Fill the well. Writers, if the only world you have to write about is the Bermuda Triangle of your desk-couch-fridge, I'm sorry but that book is not going to sell. Everyone else, you know you need to go have a good time.

Here are ways I like to #fillthewell. I've included A TON of links. I hope they help you discover your own inspiration!

Museums

I'm a huge fan of museum gazing in the winter time because you get shelter, exercise, and inspiration for a modest price. Here in the D.C.-area, where we have an embarrassment of museum riches, many of our museums are free. A friend and I recently went to the Smithsonian's Freer|Sackler, which has an incredible collection of Asian art. There we saw Buddhas and Chinese wine cups and dazzling Indian jewelry and the beautifully carved heads of pharaohs. Did you know that some Buddhists venerated a Lord of Burning Desire? I didn't either. But that's the kind of useful inspiration you can get when you go to your local museum.

Aizen Myoo, the Lord of Burning Desire, “avatar of sacred lust...recognizes and emphasizes the disruptive power of sexual passion” against evil.

Volunteering

My responsibilities as a volunteer force me to step away from my writer's desk and provide that glow that comes with giving time instead of getting paid for it. I've served as a docent at the Hillwood Museum in northwest D.C. for a year and that beautiful house and gardens have provided so much inspiration. I've learned a ton about strong women who can buy their own fancy houses, about the joy of sharing what you know with others, and about the pleasure of strolling through a greenhouse dripping with orchids and pretending -- just for a second -- that it belongs to you. 

Tomorrow come celebrate the oncoming spring with La Chandeleur or Crepe Day at Hillwood. Enjoy crepes, decorate your own version of priceless porcelain, and let me show you some of our incredible French treasures when I give a family-focused gallery talk at 10:30 and tours at 11:30 and 1:30. Come join me!

Booze

I want to insert this in here before I give the impression that I only enjoy heady pursuits. I like booze. I like to learn about the origin and creation of various alcohols, I like to read about burgeoning alcohol trends, I like to experiment with my own concoctions, and I like to have long-winded conversations about how cocktails are made. And I like to drink them. One of my favorite places to do all of the above is the Dogwood Tavern. Dogwood is the kind of place where the bartenders remember you, remember your drink of choice, make it spectacularly, and whip up a concoction with you if you catch them when it's slow. They'll also give you a pleasing nickname if you're a regular. Ours is "Angeleter."

Drew's Bulleit Rye Old-Fashioned

Wine

I also enjoy wine. This is my stepfather's fault. In 2009, my parents bought a 6.5-acre property in Sonoma County's Russian River Valley and started Gantz Family Vineyards. Suddenly I, who'd had a passing interest in wine, was part of a family that grew Pinot Noir grapes in one of the premiere Pinot Noir regions in the country. Things got much, much worse when they asked me to help them market the vineyard, and suddenly I had to learn about wine and winegrape growing in order to be able to communicate vaguely intelligently about it for their website and social media. This window into this incredible world helped inspire my latest book, The Billionaire's Prince, and the follow-up book that I'll begin in February. Here in D.C., my go-to spot for getting educated (and inspired) about wine is the the Capital Wine School. I rave more about it here.

Gantz Family Vineyards

Friends

I love my husband and my kids and my family. But I would be nothing without my friends. My friends are a wonderful pressure valve from the rest of my life, and whether they provide me tips on the writing industry or help me understand my kids better or share in a laugh and a glass of wine, they inspire me and help calm me so I can be open to inspiration. Some of my dearest friends can inspire you, too!

• Parenting coach Paige Trevor - Paige and I bonded over a shared love of this Jonathan Rhys Meyers lip bite 15 years ago and we've never looked back. Through classes, seminars, and one-on-one sessions, she helps parents understand the connection between an organized house and a calm and content family. As a Certified Parent Educator with PEP, Paige has trained over 1500 parents in the Washington, D.C.- area. Her weekly blog, Nifty Tips, is a funny, heartfelt, tough-love dose of realistic parenting advice.

• Author Sharon Wray - Sharon is the most generous soul I know, and a large portion of the romance writing world would agree with me. Sharon is a fount of selfless information and good cheer and believed in me as a writer when I didn't believe in myself. Her book, Every Deep Desire, a genre-bending romantic suspense reunion story set in Georgia swamps that hide a deeper, darker world, will come out on March 6.

• Life coach Wendy Reed - Wendy is the dear friend who introduced me to the concept of "living with intention." Living with intention means you live life proactively -- you choose to pursue a career as a creative professional or flirt more with your husband or be patient with your children -- rather than living life reactively, getting batted along the path that life chooses. Wendy is now taking this philosophy into her work as a professional life coach, helping people discover their own intentional life and then helping them figure out how to make it a reality.

Podcasts

Not all of my filling of the well is done out and about. I spend an impressive amount of time luxuriating in my pajamas and yoga pants. Podcasts give me inspiration when I'm emptying the dishwasher or walking the dog. My three recent favorites are:

• The Thirst Aid Kit - "Thirsting," as used by these brilliant hosts, is the act of desiring, crushing, lusting from afar that women do so well. This podcast honors that thirst -- an act that has sustained the movie industry and keeps the publishing industry afloat -- with intelligent, diversity-aware, and screamingly funny conversations about the people we thirst for and why.

• Girl in Space - Girl in Space is an audio drama about a girl in space, written and performed by a girl. This act should not seem so revolutionary. And yet this podcast has such a unique, interesting, wise, and funny point of view of sci-fi and space travel and story telling that it does seem revolutionary.

• The Wicked Wallflowers Club - I have been endlessly tweeting about this new podcast devoted to taking the shame out of romance reading. As I've said endlessly on Twitter, this podcast is like grabbing a coffee with your favorite author and smartest friends and talking about what makes romance novels great.

Please share your favorite ways to #FillTheWell in the comment box below. Fill free to include links, too, if you've got them. I love sharing the inspiration!

How Publishing to Wattpad Helped Me Fall Back in Love with Writing

In 2011, I stopped writing fiction. I'd researched, outlined, and plotted my way into hating my writing process. My thin skin and the rejection letters didn't help, either.

But in 2014, I discovered Wattpad. Described by some as the YouTube for ebooks, Wattpad is an app that allows writers to share their work and readers to read, follow, and comment. It encourages serialized posting of chapters, and many writers write from their phones. For me, a writer who'd spent three months researching and outlining her last attempted book and then couldn't get through the first chapter, this felt like freedom.

Four years later and with a finished book under my belt, I can honestly say that Wattpad gave me back my love of writing.

How? Wattpad allowed me to:

Break stultifying writing habits

In the first fevered days of trying out the Wattpad app, I wrote the following in my bio:

"I've always been my worst critic, and my fiction writing became paralyzed by my editing. Discovering Wattpad was a godsend because I just write and publish; beyond checking for typos and spelling errors, I work really hard to not let my judgey self get in the way of my Muse."

For years, I bound myself in chain after chain of writing "how-tos." Wattpad, with its phone-to-app publishing, its generous fans, and its encouragement to publish chapter-by-chapter rather than in whole book form, supported experimentation. Throw it at the wall and see what stuck. Don't like it? Erase it.

I felt like I could breathe again. More importantly, I felt like I could write again.

Connect with readers

The hardest part about putting a book under my bed that had been rejected by traditional publishing was the realization that my characters were never going to live and breathe in the minds of readers. I felt like I'd let my characters down. I felt like I'd killed them.

Wattpad connected my characters to readers, and the readers gave my characters life.

I was strategic about finding fans. I made my first book, Desperately Seeking, fanfiction by turning my hero into Oliver Queen from the hit TV show Arrow. It wasn't a hardship handing over my story idea -- what if a young widow placed a personal ad for "occasional companionship" -- to the gorgeous Stephen Amell.

And it allowed me to tag the story and access fans who otherwise might have overlooked me. Desperately Seeking now has 169,000 reads and I'm connected to 900 fans, a number which makes my little brain shiver.

The whole point, as I previously mentioned, was to HAVE PEOPLE READ MY WRITING.

Read fans' reactions

Not only can people read my book, that can comment on it, line by line. They can comment on their thoughts of the chapter. They can add it to reading lists with heartwarming titles like, "Could Read It Over and Over Again."

Reading people's immediate visceral responses is awesome and terrifying. I am blessed that my interactions have been 100 percent positive. I realize that not everyone is and will be this lucky. As an experienced social media manager, I am quick and ready with the delete, mute, and block buttons.

But I have been blessed, and it's amazing to see what resonates with people, what make them cry or yearn, what scenes fall flat, and what surprises you about what surprises them. People tell you when they've learned something about themselves through your book, and that immediacy is something that other reading platforms can't (yet) mimic.

Vet ideas

The book I’m posting on Wattpad, The Billionaire's Prince, (author’s note: this was an early draft of Lush Money, now available from Carina Press) began with the idea: "What if the billionaire CEO was a woman?" I thought it up while I was visiting my parents in California, laptop free, and was so intrigued by the concept that I posted a cover and a blurb to Wattpad -- from my phone -- with no sense yet of what would exist beyond the cover.

"Three days a month. That's all the billionaire wants from him. Or rather, three nights. Three nights a month for a year, and at the end, she will divorce him with a settlement large enough to save the small European principality that means everything to him. All the wealthy CEO wants? Three long, hot nights a month in her bed. And his heir."

All those details -- three nights a month, the settlement, the European principality -- I literally thought up in the five minutes it took me to write the blurb. I tacked on "and his heir" as an after thought.

The concept received so many votes and comments right off the bat that I knew it was an idea that had promise. Wattpad, with its 65 million monthly visitors who spend 15 BILLION minutes per month reading, is a wonderful place to try out a title, a chapter, an idea, and see if it has legs.

Find a writing community

The fears I had of showing my work to a critique group, a writing friend, or a judging panel were quickly overcome by the "show it to the world" nature of the Internet. I originally wrote under a pseudonym, but don't anymore. Wattpad forced me to be brave and get over my stage fright.

And in revealing myself, I've found a community of supportive, kickass writers who cheerlead me through chapters, create fanart for me, advocate for me to their readers, and invite me to new opportunities.

Wattpad superstar Fallon DeMornay has mentioned me multiple times in interviews as one of her favorite writers on Wattpad, an honor that knocks me out every time it happens. I will re-pay her one day by showering her in diamonds, cocktails, and attractive men who know how to salsa.

In 2015, I was invited to take part in a Wattpad Valentine's Day anthology by USA Today bestselling author Michelle Jo Quinn. It forced me to write the first short story I'd written in years, and The Phone Call became one of my favorite babies.

Keep ass in chair

My bio mentioned that I've always been my worst critic and that critic can lead me to take loooooooooong breaks, breaks when working for clients or planning family events or cleaning the fridge can all seem more appealing and compelling than finishing my book.

But Wattpad readers have this pesky habit of letting you know when they love you and your work. "Update please," "Update soon," "Update now please soon," are all comments that make Wattpad authors climb the wall. Now, instead of just a dusty keyboard, I have actual human beings telling me that I'm being a slacker and I need to get back to work.

There is NOTHING more motivating to keep my butt in the chair and my hands typing away than the pressure of readers excited and anxious for my words. It's awful. It's terrific. It's awfully terrific, and I'm so grateful that Wattpad has given me the opportunity to connect with readers who give a crap about my writing.

Inspiring Words for Writers

The day-to-day grind of completing a book can sometimes leave me little time or energy for seeking inspiration. That sounds counterintuitive, but that's just the sad way my process works. But now, in the lovely lull between books, finding and absorbing inspiration is an imperative -- especially as my brain turns from "creating" to "marketing", which can be such an oppressive process.

Here are some of the recent books and articles I've discovered to me keep focused on how lucky I am to be a writer -- and away from such words as "grind," "sad," and "oppressive."

"Reaching the Next Rung," Romance Writers Report, Jan. 2018

Several authors are quoted in this article from the January 2018 issue of the Romance Writers of America magazine, but my favorite advice came from bestselling author Joan Johnston. Joan offers great actionable advice for a long-term career:

• Schedule your time so writing is a priority.

• Make personal contacts with agents and editors who attend conferences.

• Form a review crew to post digital reviews of your novel. (I'd never heard of his before. Contact me if you're interested.)

• Do a newsletter at least once a month to stay in touch with readers.

She also says:

"You must give yourself the opportunity to fill the well so you have something to write about."

This is so obvious, but with demands of writing, marketing, working, and taking care of the family and the house, so easily forgotten. It reminded me to embrace the fun in my life as necessary. #Fillthewell is my new favorite social media hashtag.

Be the Gateway, A Practical Guide to Sharing Your Creative Work and Engaging an Audience by Dan Blank

I'm a longtime fan of author coach Dan Blank, who's great at offering advice that's tough yet caring for the creative spirit. This book about marketing for creative professionals blew my mind.

"Be the gateway. ... Instead of selling a product in a marketplace, you become the gateway for how your work can shape the world the world for others and inspire them."

The thesis of this book is that rather than focusing on the sell of your creative work, focus on sharing the messages that are important to you. Dan points out that, through our creative efforts, we've created this amazing conduit for sharing the beliefs that shape us. Don't waste that conduit on screaming about the 99-cent sale. Instead, share what you're passionate about. By framing the world for others in ways they can identify with or find value in, we create advocates. People don't want "deals;" they want to believe in something.

Dan puts it simply:

"Tell me about the conversations you would love to be having with others."

Mind blown. I could suddenly see my social media, marketing, newsletters, etc., as an opportunity instead of a burden. I made a list of the themes that are important to me: strong women and the confident men who love them that way, discovering your integral self, enthusiasm and compassion for a diverse world, the grandeur and value of healthy romantic partnerships, the value of filling the well... The list goes on

With Dan's practical tips on how to implement his mind-blowing ideas, I look forward to indoctrinating all of you.

Pep Talks for Writers, 52 Insight and Actions to Boost Your Creative Mojo by Grant Faulkner

Grant Faulkner, the Executive Director of National Novel Writing Month, helps support the dreams and energies of almost 400,000 writers who participate in November's writing sprint. So he knows a lot about pep talks.

He's a dedicated writer himself; we worked at the same newspaper in our 20s and when my husband and I invited him out for a weekend brunch, he said no because he had to stay home and write. In Pep Talk's 52 short and inspiring chapters with titles like "Make Your Creativity into a Routine," "Fail Often...Fail Better," and "Persisting Through Rejection," he's able to pair his passion and skill for writing with practical, soul-enriching advice.

"Approaching the world with a creative mindset is wildly transforming--because suddenly you're not accepting the world as it's delivered to you, but living through your vision of life."

He's an advocate for the creator and speaks to the person who needs to keep their feet on the ground (or their ass in the seat) when their head is in the clouds. I love this paragraph about finding your own inspiration:

"...You are the all-powerful God that sends those words--those story-igniting lightning bolts--into a world that's coming to life before your own eyes. You are your own muse."

The Wise Heart, A Guide to the Universal Teaching of Buddhist Psychology by Jack Kornfield

After a tough second semester in college, my son came home early last spring. I desperately needed to get out of my head, out of my anxiety and worry, and a dear friend handed me this book.

The Wise Heart is a wonderful way to reset. Instead of thinking that we can control everything and that all of our beliefs are true, psychologist Jack Kornfield helps guide you through Buddhist teachings that help you think bigger, more holistically, and a little softer.

We think so many things horrible things about ourselves, and for authors, that can be especially true: We're not writing enough, we're not marketing enough, we're not getting any better, everything we do sucks. This book helps you to be kinder and more compassionate to yourself and the people around you. A phrase he asks you to recite, that I think can be especially effective for the author:

May I be held in compassion. May my pain and sorrow be eased. My I be at peace.

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I'm always looking for inspiration.

Please tell me about a recent book, song, movie, painting, comic, or squiggle on the sidewalk that inspired you.